Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Heaven and Hell...

On the way to school this morning we had the following conversation:

Kid 1: Mom, does everyone get to go to Heaven?

Me: Dunno about that, kid. Not my particular religious myth.

Kid1: Yeah, but if we die isn't God supposed to forgive us our sins?

Me: Ostensibly, yes. You die, get to the gate and Peter looks at a big book of your mistakes and points a bony finger at you, whereupon you confess to stealing your sister's mascara, for which you are ever so sorry, and he lets you in. Cue angels and a Great Amount of Goodness.

Kid1: What happens if I do not confess or repent?

Me: According to that particular Religious Myth, you go to Hell.

Kid1: What is Hell like?

Me: Well, I hear there is lots of heat, fire, pain and suffering. For eternity. Like forever...

Kid1: Huh...

Me: Sorta like when Golem fell into the lava pit at the end of Lord of the Rings.

Kid 2: And you will not die. So it goes on forever and ever and ever.

Kid 1: That would SO suck.

Kis 2: So, you had better fess up about stealing my fucking mascara.